Bonding Zebras
by Elover
Summary: POST ZEBRAS. Elliot and Olivia find out about the departments CPU program. "Counseling Partners for Understanding" Will feelings come out? MAYBE SO....SMUT IS ON THE WAY
1. Chapter 1

Sorry for the hiatus…I saw the season finale and I got inspired, so here is my story!!!!!!!!

Chapter 1: The Recap

"_Wait…I want him to watch!"_

Olivia Benson was surprised herself as the words rang through her mouth. Olivia was trying to quickly think of something else to stall Dale Stukey from shooting her tied up wounded partner, Elliot Stabler. Stukey and Elliot had the same shocked expression of what Elliot should see before he receives his ultimate punishment. Olivia and Elliot's eyes connected, but this was one game plan that he could not read. As much as Elliot tried, he could not figure out what Olivia would do next.

Olivia's eyes left Elliot's, she focused on Stukey who was trying to gather his psycho-thoughts. Stukey finally spoke and said, "Watch what?"

Olivia held his hand with random strokes of her thumb over his palm. She said in the sultriest seductive voice, almost like a faint whisper, "Watch this." Olivia slowly moved to Stukey, while her eyes where focused on his lips with the need to rescue her partner from danger.

Olivia was moving closer and closer to Stukey, that's when Elliot knew what was about to happen. When Olivia started to kiss Stukey, Elliot's heart broke into a trillion pieces, because he knew deep down inside that he loves her more than any other woman he has ever met, including Kathy. Elliot was enraged with so much anger and hurt for Olivia to kiss another man. His insides warped and screamed, honestly he would rather be shot, at least that does not hurt forever.

To Elliot, this kiss feels like it lasted forever. As Olivia was kissing Stukey, she turned him so where Elliot faced Stuckey's back. Olivia had Stuckey lost in her kiss that he did not even realize that he was being played. When Olivia opened her eyes to glance at Elliot, she saw a furious side that scared her. Elliot took that as a hint to strike, therefore he did. All of his madness was put into a kick that struck Stukey in the sack. Olivia disarmed him after Elliot kicked him. Stuckey was unconscious as Olivia set Elliot free.

Elliot struggled to get up from the duck tape and slash wounds. He finally looked up and saw Olivia's gentle face and said, "How'd you know?"

Olivia helped Elliot get his coat fully on and said, "Stukey said you went out for sushi…you and raw fish?"

Elliot chuckled briefly and then looked at the chaos that Stukey had caused and said, "When will it end?"

"When the world stops turning…Hey I am gonna call Cragen and the coroner. Are you okay El?" Olivia knelt down and slightly opened his jacket so she could take a look at Elliot's knife wounds. He was focused on her, as she was concerned with his injuries. Elliot's mind drifted to the past events of her kissing Stukey. He shook his head violently to get rid of the memory, gently grabbed Olivia hands and said, "Liv, I think I need a doctor."

Their eyes connected from the unusual contact, and stayed that way until after Olivia said, "They're on the way, I called them before I came."

"Okay." Elliot was still stuck on Olivia's beautiful face, and yet he started to wonder '_why in the world did she kiss him'._ As Olivia left the room to call Cragen, his eyes was still focused on her. Elliot was still in the room with O'Halleran's body and unconscious Stukey. He sat back down in the chair he was in, his mind was running all over the place so he began to get upset.

Olivia got finished making the calls to Cragen and the coroner. She still stayed outside so she could gather her thoughts of what just happened in the lab. The coroner, ambulance, fellow police officers, Medical Examiner Warner, Munch, Fin and Cragen showed up at the crime scene. Elliot was in the ambulance getting check out, while Fin, Munch and Cragen were talking amongst themselves. Cragen left the male group and went to Olivia who was leaning against the hood of her car.

Cragen was saddened and said, "I want every piece of information you have on this, I expect you and your partners statements on my desk by the end of this week. Understood?"

"Yeah Cap...How is Elliot?" Olivia stated. She tried to look over in his direction but she could clearly see that Elliot was not trying to make eye contact with her.

Cragen caught the small scene between the two and said, "He will be fine, but how are you?"

Olivia lied, "I am okay."

M.E. Warner walked up to Olivia and the Captain and said, "What the hell happened here?"

Olivia sighed and said, "It was Stukey. He killed O'Halleran and knifed up Elliot."

"My goodness, it never ends!" Warner walked away to examine her friend.

Cragen looked back at Olivia and said, "I am going to schedule Elliot to have a couple days off, but I wanna speak with you and him tomorrow in my office. Okay?"

"Yes sir."

Olivia went home and decided not to go see Elliot at the hospital because she knew that his wife, Kathy, would be there. So she sent him a text message. Elliot's phone rings through the hospital. He flips it open and he reads it to himself.

_Benson:_ _Hey El, I hope you are okay? Cragen wants to speak with us tomorrow in his office. Text me back to let me know that you received this message._

He replied quickly and said:

_Stabler:_ _Okay…Goodnight_

Elliot was happy that Olivia checked on him, but he was mad that she kissed Stukey. Of all people Stukey. He kept looking at his phone like another message was going to pop up, but the reality is that he cannot get the image of them out of his head. Elliot was not trying to ignore Olivia but he figured, '_if I don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all.'_ He knew that eventually they will have to talk about it all. Elliot looked up to find his Kathy's questioning eyes on him.

Kathy's arms were folded across her chest, "Who could possibly be calling you at this hour Elliot?"

"It's Liv." Elliot said quickly.

Kathy watched Elliot for a minute, she was studying his facial expressions. It looked like he had lost his puppy, so she decided speak, "What does she want?"

Elliot was adjusting his bandages and said, "Cragen wants to speak with us tomorrow about tonight."

"Alright. Hey, what happened tonight? I know you are hurting its written all over your face." Kathy said worried.

"Nothing happened everything is fine." he lied.

Kathy's feelings started to get hurt. She started to get loud with Elliot in the hospital room. "Why do you continue to let shut me out but let Olivia in?"

"What?! Do not start with that shit tonight Kathy. I am not in the mood." Elliot's face began to get tensed up as he was speaking.

The doctor came in the room to discharge Elliot so he could go home. Kathy was standing in front of the doctor talking to Elliot and said, "I am your wife Elliot not her."

The doctor walked and stood between the two and notice that their gaze between each other could cut glass. He said in a low tone, "Is everything okay here?"

Elliot said irritated, "Fine. Can I go yet?"

"Yeah, Uh…just take these papers to the front and give them your signature, and you will be out of here", said the doctor.

"Thank you" Kathy and Elliot walked out the hospital and headed home. Lately, Kathy has been accusing Olivia of trying to come in between their marriage. What Kathy does not realize is that Olivia is the one trying to save their marriage. There has been countless times when she has covered or lied for Elliot to keep the peace at his home.

Meanwhile, Olivia has just now hit the sheets from the shower. She has let the events from the day soak in her mind and lay heavily on her heart. She kissed a co-worker, lost a co-worker and her partner is ignoring her. Olivia sighed and decided that if she got some sleep, then by morning she would feel somewhat better.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was going on 9:00am and everyone was bright and early, Fin and Munch were already at their desk working, Olivia was getting settled in at her desk, and Cragen was just opening his door prepared for another day. An hour passed and Elliot showed up in jeans and a blue polo shirt that showed his muscles rather well. Olivia's eyes darted to him when he knocked on Cragen's door.

Cragen came to his door and signaled for Olivia to come in his office with him and Elliot. As she was walking to the door, she was wondering why Elliot was ignoring her. She is still confused of what she did to make him so mad.

When she came in to Cragens office, Elliot kept his eyes straight ahead until she sat down. Cragen catches the glances and eye stares but he knows that there is some tension between them. So he has made a decision to follow a department rule he has failed to comply with. Cragen sat on his desk and watched them both.

"So…how are we?" Cragen looked back and forth at Olivia and Elliot set for any answer.

Elliot nodded back and forth and said, "Good." Olivia stayed silent but nodding her head in agreement.

Cragen got up and sat in his seat and smiled but said, "I fail to believe that Stabler. I just don't believe that is true."

Olivia squint her eyes and asked, "Why what's wrong?"

Cragen said, "I know that there has been some stress between you guys and considering what your partnership has been through I can kinda understand. Your partnership has hit some bumps that have not been look at, first Gitano, then Bushido and now this with Stukey. You two have been partners for almost eleven years, and you guys have never attended the CPU program."

"What the hell is the CPU program?" Elliot said.

Cragen continued and said, "CPU means 'Counseling Partners for Understanding'. It is my understanding that you guys have never gone. Correct..." he waited for an answer but neither said anything. "…Therefore, you will attend duo sessions with a therapist every weekday for the next 4 weeks from noon until 1:30 p.m."

Olivia started to get mad and said, "Why do you think we need a therapist?"

"You two shall find out why you need a therapist. What ever is said in those sessions will not be reported to me because it's kept confidential between you…" then Cragen pointed at Elliot. "… and you and your therapist. I will not get a report of anything and you will start Monday with your therapy sessions."

Elliot nervously said, "So Liv and I will be in the same room, at the same time talking to the same therapist?"

"Yes! He or she will help you out at the same time so you two can understand and appreciate the other. Understood?" Cragen said as he waits for an answer.

The duo just nodded and exited the office. Olivia went back to her desk and got back to work. She looked up and saw Elliot watching her, but then he stopped and exited the precinct to go back home.


	2. The First Meeting

**Chapter 2: The First Meeting**

Over the weekend, Cragen gave the duo the weekend off because he had a big decision to make with who should be their therapist. Since this is his first time making this protocol decision, he wanted the therapist to be someone that he trusted and someone who could gain the trust of Elliot and Olivia. Cragen did not want the person to be Dr. George Huang, because he works with them all on a daily basis. Since Olivia and Elliot are good-looking people, he decided that the individual would have to be married with children. So, Cragen came to the conclusion that they will see his old therapist Dr. Chris Davis.

Dr. Davis is a very well-decorated doctor that's very well known for being a success with all of his patients. He helped Cragen become sober with the help of AA meetings for almost 13 years. He was a marriage counselor for 10 years, so he has experience with helping married couples becoming more supportive and considerate to the other. Even though Elliot and Olivia are not married, this partnership is considered a marriage of sorts.

The weekend went on with neither Elliot nor Olivia communicating with each other. However, both spent the weekend thinking about what would happen Monday in the therapy session.

It was a beautiful Monday morning and Elliot just arrived at the 1-6. Olivia had got there earlier with coffee for him and her. Olivia was away from her desk when Elliot entered, he hung his jacket up and walked around to his desk and that's when he noticed the coffee. He sat down in his chair, twirled the plastic coffee container and started to smile because Olivia was so wonderful to him. Olivia appeared from up stairs through the crib door, and Elliot was watching her as she came down the stairs reading a file.

Olivia reached her desk and found that Elliot was looking at her. Olivia began to smile and said, "Good Morning"

He barely smiled back and said, "Morning…" Elliot pointed at the coffee and continued, "Thank you."

"You're welcome El." Olivia passed him to take a file to Cragen's office, and he smelled her sweet scent. Elliot started to get to work but he began to think about the incidents of last week. He is still kind of upset that Olivia and Stukey kissed. It took some time but he understands that she did it to save him. It just hurts.

The day was going all right, they got a lot of work done before lunch time hit. They did not speak unless it had something to do with giving information for a particular case. Everything was going well until 11:35a.m when Cragen told the two to enter his office.

The pair sat down and Cragen said, "I will be short. Here is the address of the therapist I want you to see. His name is Dr. Chris Davis and he located a block away from here. The CPU program is only supposed to be between us. It's a kind of don't ask, don't tell policy, if you understand. I called him over the weekend and he was briefed about your history together. He is expecting you at noon. That will be all."

The two exited without saying a word to the Captain. Elliot and Olivia went to there desk to lock their respective computers. At the coat rack they were glanced at each other and Elliot said, "Liv…uh since the place is so close do you feel like walking?"

Olivia buttoned up her coat and responded, "Yeah that would be fine."

As Elliot turned around to grab the doctor's address from his desk, Olivia started fantasizing of Elliot in nothing but his boxers. She does not know why her mind randomly keeps pulling her back to that dream world. She tries to knock her thoughts of him in the back of her mind so she would not act on them. Olivia does not want to ruin Elliot's marriage or their partnership, but sometimes she wonders 'what if'… 'what if'… 'what if'…

"Liv... Liv… Olivia?" Elliot said rather loudly.

Olivia responded with such a dazed look in her eyes, "Huh?"

Elliot was at the door, "I said 'Are your ready'?"

Olivia ran her fingers through her hair and said, "Yeah, sorry. I got side-tracked."

The walk from the precinct was filled with small talk or no talk at all. Elliot did not seem too talkative, therefore, Olivia felt that she was not being appreciated and kind of ignored by her partner. Elliot was not trying to ignore her but he feels so hurt by her kissing Stukey. Both of them have underlying feelings for the other but neither has a clue about it.

When they reached the office of Dr. Chris Davis, Elliot and Olivia's stomach fell three feet. Olivia knocked and Dr. Davis opened the door and said, "Hello Olivia… Elliot. How are you guys?"

"Good" They said in unison.

Dr. Davis has a very lively attitude, "Great. Well come on in and we will get started."

Elliot and Olivia walked through the office and noticed that his place has a more modern style. They thought that was awkward considering how much older he looked. They reached his session room and sat down in two chairs that were side by side, with a small table between them. On the table were two tablets and two pencils.

Dr. Davis sat down, grabbed their file and said, "Don told me about the trouble that you guys have been having. Now as a therapist, I do not choose sides, I am neutral. From what I understand there is a communication issue. I do not know if you guys see it, but Don does. Hence, the reason you are here. Since we have such a short time together, we will only do one exercise a day to expand understanding and appreciation between you two. Do we have any questions so far?"

"No not yet." Elliot said. Dr. Davis looked at Olivia.

She responded, "No"

Dr. Davis continued, "Great! Well if you do, at anytime during the session please stop me and ask. As a doctor, you have my word that what's said in here will not have outside ears. By the way, I suggest that you do not tell anyone that you are taking therapy sessions together because that adds stress on you in the workplace."

"Ha. Can't compare to half of the stuff floatin' around about us now" Olivia said it so quick, that she did not even realize it.

"Like what?" said Dr. Davis.

"Uh… nothing" Olivia said, as she looked to the floor.

"Listen. The more you are open and honest with me and each other, these sessions will go a lot better. Sometimes when you open up and allow yourself to be honest, you grow to learn new things about each other and touch subjects that you didn't even know existed. Can we agree on being honest?"

"Yeah" They said in unison. Elliot and Olivia had their eyes glued to the floor but randomly glanced at the doctor.

Dr. Davis went through his speech of four basic ways to screw up communication with each other; he explained that if you have done one, you have committed them all:

Not ever listening.

Demonstrating a complete lack of understanding.

Allowing huge amounts of resentment build up.

Never talking about situations after they happen.

The doctor looked at Elliot and Olivia and asked, "Have you ever committed any one of the four screw ups against each other and if so which one?"

Neither Elliot nor Olivia wanted to speak up first so, the doctor pointed for Elliot to speak first.

Elliot said, "Yeah …I…uh…have done that before. I allowed resentment to build."

Dr. Davis nodded his head and said, "That's a good start. Olivia?"

"Not talking about a situation after it happens." Olivia stated.

Dr. Davis said, "This is a great start you guys, but I noticed that you two have not made eye contact since being in this room. Are you scared to look at each other when you communicate? Making eye contact shows the other person that you have their attention…"

Dr. Davis began to chuckle because he thought it was kind of absurd how they would look to the floor every time they spoke, so he came up with an idea. He continued to speak, "…I have an idea. Both of you turn your chairs toward each other. So, when you talk about each other to me or amongst yourselves you automatically have each others attention."

Elliot and Olivia did as they were instructed and sat back down in their chairs with full eye contact upon each other.

The doctor said, "Don't look my way any more but pay attention to my voice and answer my questions while looking at each other. Okay?"

"Okay" Olivia said.

Elliot responded right after her and said, "Yeah"

The duo was swimming in each others eyes. For some reason neither wanted to ever look away from the other ever again. Olivia and Elliot started to smile at each other but then it totally went away when Dr. Davis began to speak, "Olivia, tell me about one situation where you did not want to talk about after it happened?"

Olivia's stomach turned into knots really quick. She started to look at Elliot with sorry expression. She knew this conversation was bound to come up at one point. Olivia focused on Elliot's eyes and started to explain, "We were dealing with a serial-killer rapist named Gitano that were holding a little brother and sister hostage. We spotted Gitano in the subway station with the kids. The little boy was by the escalator while Elliot was trying to get him to come to him. I pulled my gun to try and get Gitano but he cut… my throat while he was using the little girl as a shield. Elliot saw this and made the decision to come and see how I was instead of getting the boy…"

Olivia had small tears streaming down her eyes. She watched Elliot as his face started to get sad as he remembered the critical choice he made.

Olivia continued, "…Gitano escaped up the escalators with the children and killed the boy in the street. Later on, we found Gitano and the little girl at a warehouse and there was another hostage situation with Elliot as the hostage. El was giving me the okay to kill him just to take out Gitano. Luckily, SWAT was there and they made the shot that I could not take. That night at the little girl's hospital room Elliot said, 'That we chose each other over the job, and we should not be partners anymore.' So I told the Captain that I wanted a new partner. Soon there after I got shipped to computer crimes and then I took a job with the FBI. I just left. I could not take it. I saw that he tried to call and get in touch with me on plenty different occasions I just did not want to talk because I was so hurt."

Olivia wiped the tears from her face and looked back at Elliot who looked like he was depressed. Dr. Davis chimed in and said, "Wow. Okay Elliot, you have a chance now to ask her whatever you would like."

Elliot shifted in his chair with his eyes still on Olivia and said, "I understand that I hurt you in the hospital that night but that's not all I said. After that incident with Gitano, I never pictured losing you. I can't take the risk of losing you anymore Liv, it scared the shit out of me…but then you left me. My fear came true. So my question is… what made you come back?"

Olivia hesitated on the answer, but said it in a whisper, "You…I missed you."

Elliot felt like someone took his breath away when she said that. He felt ecstatic on the inside but he hid it well on the outside. He thought he was going to hear something about the job, not him. His mouth dropped but he finally picked it up when the doctor said, "Elliot, when have you allowed resentment build against Olivia?'

Elliot still had so many questions for Olivia, but instead he answered the doctor's question. He shook his head slowly for a second and said, "I resented Olivia because she left me and just disappeared with no word of where she was. I had to find out and pull information from other people. I was so worried about her, my hair started coming out and everything. I was going through a divorce at the time and I needed her to be there so bad. At work, I was forced to have another partner, and everything that happened in that time frame was based on the decision that she made to leave me. I did not even get a chance to have a say in anything…she just left."

Olivia eyes stayed on his as she began to speak. "I had to leave you Elliot, because you were right."

Elliot said, "With what, Liv?"

Olivia was scared to explain because she knew that this would bring up a whole other subject, "We are being honest with each other right?"

Elliot nodded.

Olivia continued, "I… started caring more about you than the job. I always found a way to put you first, and I still do. The job started to take a back burner to everything that concerned you. I would put myself on the line to keep you alive and safe. You have more to lose. I would go to any extreme to keep you out of harms way. You mean a lot to me…what can I say? You are all I have. I put you first. The reason I left was because I did not know how to tell you that. I didn't know how you would take it."

Elliot's face was falling with tears, he did not know that Olivia's protection and friendship went that deep. In that instant he wanted to tell her how much he is in love with her. But instead he said, "I am so sorry for how I have been acting. I am so sorry for the way I have treated you. I…uh….I"

Elliot and Olivia broke eye contact cause Dr. Davis interrupted and said, "Guys we have to resume tomorrow because you have to go back to work. This is a great start. Olivia, I appreciate you being open and honest with us about your feelings. I know it was probably tough, but do you feel a little better?"

Olivia responded, "Yeah, actually I do"

"Good. Tomorrow we will resume and I have an activity that will help you more along this process. Good-bye!"

Elliot and Olivia walked out with out saying anything to each other, but then when they hit the outside streets, Elliot grabbed Olivia's hand and said, "We need to talk alone."


	3. The Second Meeting

**Chapter 3: The Second Meeting**

Still holding his hands, Olivia looked at Elliot with pleading eyes and said, "El, I just don't think that's a good idea."

Elliot was stroking the back of her hand and said, "Why, not? I think we really have some things that we should discuss! We actually have some heartfelt issues here!"

"I understand that. That's why I would like for what ever we have to say come out in these sessions because what we have been doing so far has not worked." Olivia stated.

Olivia let Elliot's hand go and proceeded to walk down the street; he soon then followed behind her, but asked a question. "I don't think we need to sit in front of some therapist and talk about things that are going on with us."

Olivia turned to him while walking and said annoyingly, "Well now we have to because of Cragen and this CPU Program. I don't think we should speak about none of this until our feelings with us and our partnership are out on the table. I think this will be good for us."

Elliot and Olivia reached the top of precinct steps, and he stood there in a daze and said, "I thought everything was fine with us."

Olivia was about to grab the door to enter but said foolishly, "Yeah, you thought the same thing with Kathy and looked what…uh…I'm sor…" She turned to Elliot and apologized.

Elliot almost choked on his breath; he was very hurt by that comment. He responded, "No that's fine. You know what you are right we'll just talk about this in the sessions." He entered the door first to leave Olivia outside.

The day went on with a little bit of silence between the two. Cragen came up to the pair's desk, and said discreetly, "How did everything go?"

"It went all right. We have to be there again tomorrow." Olivia said looking at Elliot.

Cragen looked at Elliot who tried to stay engulfed in his paperwork, "You too?"

Elliot didn't even look up but said, "It was fine."

"Great well its almost time for me leave, have a good night all." Cragen left the building but he had a feeling that everything was not right, but that's the reason that they are in they CPU program. By the time he reached his car he knew that they soon will find out what every one already knows.

The SVU family left all at the same time. By the time Olivia arrived home she was still thinking about the hurtful comment she said to Elliot. An hour later, she sent Elliot a text message.

Elliot's phone went off while he was eating with Eli and the twins, Lizzie and Dickie. Kathy had gone out, Maureen had her own life in upper New York, and Kathleen was in the rehab. His phone went off.

Lizzie said, "Oh you can have a phone at the table but we can't?"

Elliot said, "Yes that's right because I am daddy." He flipped the phone open and saw it was a text from Olivia.

_Benson: I'm really sorry El. Forgive me? : (_

Elliot was hurt but he did not let that comment get to him because he knew she did not mean anything by it. He responded

_Stabler: I told you its fine. I have to take Eli to the doctor in the morning but I will make the session. See you later._

When Olivia received the text, she was relieved that he was still communicating with her. Usually, when he gets mad, angry or upset even sad, he will just shut every one out including her.

The next day started as well as all others, with victims that needed justice. Olivia, Fin, and Munch arrived at work the same time after the Captain. They all started to get to work, fortunately for the whole part of the morning they had to only do paper work.

Time slipped by so fast, Cragen came out of his office noticing what time it was and called out to Olivia. "Benson! Shouldn't you be somewhere…now?"

Olivia turned and looked at her clock. It read 11:55a.m. She grabbed her coat and ran out the door saying, "Oh crap. Sorry Cap. I lost track of time. So sorry!"

Olivia exited the precinct and ran like hell down the street to the therapist office, so she could make the appointment. When she got there, Elliot's car was not in sight so she felt like she was in the clear. The door was unlocked, so Olivia walked in without ringing the door bell. She reached the room and she found Elliot and Dr. Davis already sitting and waiting.

Olivia waved her hand and said, "Uh…Hi sorry I'm late. El, I did not see your car outside."

Elliot smiled a bit because he knew she was running to get there, "Yeah I walked. I left it at the station so we could walk back together."

"Oh mmm...kay" Olivia sat down in her respective chair and saw those same tablets and pencils sitting on the table in the same spot. She took of her jacket and began to get comfortable as the doctor started talking.

Dr. Davis waited until Olivia got situated and said, "I'm glad you made it on time Olivia. I want to get started with today's session, but yesterday I know we had to go but Elliot I cut you off and you were trying to say something?"

Elliot looked shocked as the doctor was completing his sentence. He looked at Olivia and looked back at the doctor and said, "I forgot…It will come back sooner or later." Elliot knew what he wanted to say he just figured that now is not the time to tell her.

Dr. Davis apologized, "Well I'm sorry I had to cut you off in the middle of your thought. From now own that will not happen again. I want us to go ahead and get started because I have a lot of activities that I want us to complete."

The doctor came around his desk and sat on the corner of it and said, "First, I want each of you to grab a tablet and pencil on the table then turn your chairs back-to-back."

The duo did as instructed. As soon as he sat back down, Elliot briefly closed his eyes because he could smell Olivia's hair, he had a mental picture of running his fingers through the sandy strands. Olivia ran her fingers through her hair because she could smell Elliot's aftershave. She sunk herself in the seat and remained still for a while.

Dr. Davis continued to talk, "Now that we are settled, I'm going to ask each of you an individual question. After that, the opposite individual, who I didn't give the question to, will respond with how they feel. Keep your heads straight ahead, and your eyes closed. Until I tell you to open them. Understood?"

Dr. Davis waited a while to continue after he received confirmation that they will cooperate. He wanted their eyes to get adjusted to the dark, but then continued to talk. "Olivia, what do you miss most about your partnership with Elliot?"

Olivia slightly laughed, paused and said, "What I miss most about us was that… when we started this partnership we could tell each other anything. We shared so much personal information with each other. We built a friendship. Besides coming into work dealing with the cases… I had so much fun with him. All of us used to chill after work hours. The first couple of years of our partnership, we would joke sometimes no matter what case we had. As the years went, I guess we just lost that kind of friendship. I miss it though, because it helped me deal…with cases and everything else. I just miss it."

Dr. Davis said, "Elliot would you like to respond?"

Elliot had a pleasant smile on his face as he remembered those times. He could see how much fun they had in his mind. "I miss that too. We used to throw this small ball around the room as we compared information. I don't know what happened. As the times went, the cases became harder and harder to deal with. It felt like no matter how many bad guys we put away there is always a million more. Sometimes it just felt like even though you are doing a lot, it's not enough. Then it was some things at home with Kathy, because she would keep complaining about how I am not home for the family. After that, I just started coming straight home after work unless we had a fight. Honestly, Liv, I miss those times too."

Olivia was pleased to know that Elliot misses those times. She said, "I understand that you have a family and I am not trying to intervene with that at all. That's why I never said anything."

Elliot waited until she finished talking and said, "I think we should work on getting that back though. What do you think Liv?"

Through the darkness of her eyes, she could see Elliot's handsome smile. Olivia smiled herself and said, "That would be nice, But what about your family?"

Elliot said, "It would be fine. Maureen is up state, Kathleen is in rehab, the twins are always gone somewhere with friends or something, and Eli and Kathy are the only ones home. Soon as I get home, I play with Eli then I put him to bed every night. Kathy and I hardly ever talk anyway because it's always… something."

Dr. Davis saw the look on Elliot's face as he spoke about his wife. Since he was a marriage counselor before, he has seen that look that was showing on his face. It's a look of unhappiness and despair. Dr. Davis paused, touched Elliot's shoulder and whispered, "Okay, We will have to touch on the subject of your wife later."

Elliot nodded.

Dr. Davis let some time pass before he asked the next question, "Elliot…How would you feel if right now, at this moment, Olivia was not in your life anymore? After knowing her for so long with the relationship that you guys have developed, how would you feel if she was not here us?"

Olivia remained silent with a couple of tears streaming down her eyes. Elliot choked on his own air, he knew what the doctor meant by _'not here with us'_. Elliot felt his heart compress into immediate sorrow. He now senses that everything that they have ever argued about, thought about, fought about and said now does not even matter. Elliot was careful with his words, "I know that I would have no ability to feel or even understand life from then on. I would not be able to express myself to anyone else as openly as I did with her. All I can say is that, I would consider myself to have been blessed to know an angel so lovely and compassionate. …I would feel like I lost my best friend, my sister and my confidant because she has a certain glow and angel light that just makes people want to smile. Only angels make you wanna smile all the time. I would feel like she left without knowing how much she means to me. And if she left now, she would never know."

Dr. Davis said, "Olivia would you like to respond to Elliot?"

Olivia was sitting with tears coming out of her closed eyes. She sniffed a couple of times as she began to wipe her face. Olivia ran her fingers through her hair and said, "Elliot I think that was the nicest thing you have ever said about me… ever. I thank you so much for your kind words." Speechless. Olivia wanted to tell him how much she loved him, at that moment but she felt like he would never feel the same way as she would. Olivia held back.

Dr. Davis was looking at the pair and he realized something as they were speaking. The reason that they are so angry and frustrated at each other is because they cannot really communicate how they truly feel without causing some strife and trouble in each others life. Dr Davis said, "I can clearly see that you guys appreciate each other, but it seems like outside of these walls, you guys cannot express that for some reason. Both of you have to learn that it is okay to say how you feel. It's all apart of communication."

The doctor watched them for a minute and decided that it was okay for them to open their eyes. "Open your eyes you two. I have another activity for us to complete."

As their eyes adjusted to the light they could feel themselves back in reality. The doctor continued to speak, "…Grab your pencils and tablets. Write down your likes and dislikes about each other. You both will have a chance to hear the other explain why they feel that way. I want you to be extremely honest. It can be something we have discussed all ready or not, but your limit for each column is five things."

The pair did as instructed. Seven minutes passed, and Olivia was already finished with both of her list. Elliot was on his way to being done, but he was scared to mention or talk about things that were supposedly put behind them. He decided to anyway.

Dr. Davis said, "Are we finished? Great! Pencils down. Olivia how about you go first?"

Olivia took a deep breath and began to speak,

"The five things that I like about Elliot is:

He is a protector

Family Man

He cares about each victim

He's a Big Brother to me

The loyalty towards his wife

The five things I dislike:

Sometimes he's very angry

Not trusting of me and the decisions I make

Not being there for me

Shutting me out when things happen

Not very Understanding"

It took a minute for Elliot to process everything she said, but when he did he started to get immediately on the defensive. "I know these days I have a tendency to get angry and not be understanding quicker than other times, but when have I not backed your play with decisions you made? Most importantly, when have I not been there for you?"

Elliot waited for Olivia to answer but he did not hear her speak, so he continued to, "I was there, when you were dealing with your brother. I backed you up with it all. I was there after you broke up with Kurt. I back you up when we got in mess with so many things whether it was a bad decision or not. I have been there for you"

Olivia could feel the fumes radiating from the back of his neck. She whispered, "Sealview…I needed you at Sealview."

Elliot finally understood what Olivia meant. She never told him what happened there, and Elliot always wondered but not really sure if he wants to know. But he has to ask anyway, "Olivia, what happened at Sealview?"

Olivia took a deep breath and said, "I am going to make a long story short. I got trapped down in the basement with the guard, and he was very close to raping me if Fin did not come in. Elliot, he was so close that his penis was in front of my face. I felt helpless because he beat me and everything. It took a while to get over that, but I can deal with it now. I… I …I just needed you there, not Fin. I am grateful for him, but I just wanted you. I needed you."

Elliot heart was aching to hold her, but he had to restrain from it. He said, "Olivia, I am so sorry I was not there to protect you like I should have. I wanted to go on that case instead of Fin. I really did. But I have to be honest, if I did go I would be facing murder charges." Elliot was trying to unclench his fist, but he was so angry at the pain that Olivia had to endure.

"Elliot, it's your turn to give your list to Olivia." Dr. Davis said.

Elliot took a deep breath and began to speak. He realized his list was missing some things in the dislike column but he still proceeded,

"The five things that I like about Olivia is:

Passionate about victims

The way she handles each case

She is always there for me and my family

Her Heart

Her Smile

The five things that I dislike:

Not being open with me

When she left for Oregon

Kissing Stukey"

Olivia was quiet because she knew that those topics would come up. Dr. Davis looked at Olivia and said, "Are you going to respond?"

Olivia laughed up under her breath and said, "You understand why I left for Oregon, but it's funny how you got mad at me for kissing Stukey to save your life, when you kissed Dani."

Elliot's eyes got real big and wide because he wondered how she knew about that incident. He felt like a little boy that just got caught doing something very bad.

Dr. Davis looked confused, but then remembered, "Oh Dani Beck. I read about her in your file. When Olivia left for Oregon she took her place as your partner. Wow I didn't know that you had feelings for her Elliot?"

Elliot almost got out of his seat but remained seated and said forcefully, "WAIT! NO! I did not have feelings for her, and how did you know that Liv?"

Olivia did not answer.

"I'm waiting for an answer Olivia…Please?" Elliot said.

Olivia said, "Honestly El, I was back for a while before I helped with the Danielle Masoner case. I came back when Casey put a request to the FBI for me to appear at trial… I met Dani when I came up there to talk to you but, you were in interrogation. She was sitting in my seat. Wow! So I went to go and talk to Cragen and then I saw you two looking cozy. I did not want to interrupt. After you guys locked up Victor Bodine, that night Casey called to see if I wanted to come out for drinks as well. As I was turning the corner, I saw you and her kissing her and I just…I left."

Elliot felt so bad that she saw that, he knew that he did not have any feelings for her. He said, "I don't know what to say."

Olivia looked confused, "You don't have to say anything. You do not have to explain yourself to me Elliot, I am not your wife."

Elliot responded, "No! I do." He waited to speak until he calmed down, "I did not have any feelings for her at all. I really didn't Olivia!"

Olivia looked toward the ceiling and chuckled but said, "Well, why did you kiss her?"

"I kissed her because I wanted her to be you!" Before Elliot knew it, the words escaped his lips and he dropped his head.

After those words, Olivia quickly turned around to see Elliot. She was facing the back of his head, because he was still turned to the wall. Olivia was hurt by the kiss but it happen so long ago, but now when she heard his feelings of why, she doesn't know what to think.

Dr. Davis was shocked at the outburst from Elliot, but he had to ask a crucial question, "Elliot…are you in love with Olivia?"

Elliot heart was beating out of his system and he felt nauseous. The secret was out and he could not even form words in his mouth. "I…uh…the session is over and I have to go." With that he rushed out of the door with out looking at Olivia. He headed to the precinct to get his car and go home.

Olivia was still stuck in shock at Dr. Davis office. She gathered her things and told the doctor, in a dazed way, that she is headed back to work. She proceeded to walk down the block like a zombie.

On the way home, Elliot could not believe what had just happen in the doctor's office. He was cursing him self for being so careless. Elliot reached his house by 2:00 in the after noon. He was about to pull into the drive way but he saw an unfamiliar car already there in his spot.

**CLIFFHANGER!!!!**


	4. House Guest

**THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS…You guys make me want to write everyday!!! I may be a DUNCE but, if someone tells me how to reply to the reviews in fan fiction then, I will reply to you all! ****Mayra123****,** **I am sorry if I made you late for work…lol!**

**Chapter 4: House Guest**

Elliot looked at the car trying to remember any of Kathy's girlfriends with the same car, but none could come to mind. Liz and Dickie were still in school and the unfamiliar car is not Maureen's. Elliot's mind came to stopping halt. He decided to quietly enter his house and see what was going on.

Elliot came through the back door of his house and entered through the kitchen. He heard voices but could not make out what they were saying. As he quietly walked into the Living Room, he saw the unfamiliar car keys on the table with a hat. Elliot knew that the hat was not his or Dickie's so he assumed that it was the visitor's belongings. He grabbed the hat to see if it had a masculine scent, and it did. While he was holding the hat, he heard Kathy faintly laughing from up stairs.

Elliot was in the Living Room furious as hell because another man is in his house without his knowing, and he started to think for how long it has been happening. He wanted to go upstairs and wreck the whole party but he decided to wait at the stairs to see how much he can hear.

Elliot gently walked up the stairs and noticed that the unknown guy and Kathy were in a bedroom. He could not tell whether they were to the left or the right of the upstairs. If they were to the left, he would know that the pair would be in his bedroom that he shares with his wife, Kathy. On the right side of the upstairs were the kid's rooms. Elliot closed his eyes and started to use his senses, and the noises came from the **right** side of the house. Elliot could hear the guy talking and laughing with Kathy.

He finally got to the top stairs without being noticed and everything was becoming clear.

He heard Kathy say softly, "Jack, it's so nice to see you two together again. It makes me wish things were different."

Jack whispered, "What do you mean?"

Kathy looked at him humorlessly and said, "You know what I mean! Anyway, thanks for putting him to sleep for me."

Jack looked at her and said, "I barely get to hold him when I come see you. He is so adorable. I can't believe how big my little man has got."

Elliot leaned against the wall with a tear falling from his face. Elliot had to catch his breath because he was about to pass out from all the madness, hurt and pain that was rushing to his heart. Eli was not his son. One of his worst fears came true. Elliot decided that he was not going to flip out about it now, because it would wake Eli.

Elliot came in Eli's room, where Kathy and Jack were sitting down with Eli in Jack's arms. Jack noticed Elliot first, and then Kathy followed Jack's eyes and realized who he was looking at. Elliot was slightly chuckling with a tears flowing from his face. He was careful not to be loud and wake Eli.

Kathy tried to speak, but Elliot held his hand up to let her know not to talk. Instead Elliot said, "I…asked…you the day before you gave birth to him, 'Did you see anyone else while we were separated?'"

Kathy said, "I know and I am sorry."

Elliot looked at Jack and said, "Yeah, I am sure you are." He looked back at Kathy and said, "I would be upset that you cheated on me if I loved you, but I am not. I am pissed off at the fact that Eli is not my son."

Jack tried to apologize, "Elliot I am so sorry… man it just happened!"

Elliot watched as Jack put Eli in the crib. Elliot sarcastically said, "How it happened Jack? You just tripped over a stick and fell in the pussy? I knew you from the Police Academy Jack! Was it a class I missed when they said it was okay to sleep with your ex-partner's wife?"

Jack looked away and Kathy said, "Now Elliot what a minute, you have been sleeping with Olivia forever. The late nights? I know what that was about."

"Not that it matters now, but I have never slept with Olivia. I have been faithful to only you, since we have been married. Now I am wondering, 'why did I come back when I didn't even love you?'" Elliot responded.

Elliot was beginning to walk out the door, but said, "I want a paternity test! I will come back later to talk to the kids to tell them why they will be living in two separate places from now on. I still want to see my kids, including Eli. Just not you!" Elliot went over and gave Eli a kiss on his forehead, and said, "Love you kiddo!"

Elliot grabbed some clothes, an overnight bag and before walking out the door, he left his wedding ring on the Living Room table by Jack's keys. He headed to the one place that he knows he would feel comfortable and needed. The Special Victims Unit Department.

It was almost five o'clock, and Olivia was about to leave but she saw Elliot come through the doors with bags in his hand. Elliot headed straight upstairs to the cribs, without looking at anyone. Olivia wanted to ask him about the discussion in the session, but she had a feeling that what ever he is going through now is deeper than that. She followed him.

Olivia reached the top stairs and decided to listen before entering. Once she entered the room she said, "Hey El, are you okay?"

Elliot snapped back at her and said, "Does it look like I'm okay?" He collected himself and realized that Olivia is not the one he is mad with. He apologized, "I'm sorry Liv"

She sat on the cot he was on, rubbed his back and said, "Its okay, how about you tell me what wrong?"

Elliot held his head in his hands and said, "I rather not talk about it right now."

Olivia pulled his hands from his face and gently said, "Open up to me El. What's wrong?"

Elliot looked at her with red teary eyes, "Liv he's not mine. Eli is not my son. When Kathy and I were separated, she was seeing someone else. They have been seeing each other since then. I caught them putting Eli to sleep and…I don't think he is my son. I wonder why she just didn't tell me."

Olivia has never seen Elliot really cry, but she was so heart broken for him over this situation. "Elliot… I am so sorry! Everything will work out."

"Yeah…I hope for that. Thank You." Elliot proceeded to lie down and try and get some rest.

Olivia got up as she watched him. "El, what are you doing?"

Elliot sat his bags over by him and said, "I am going to be staying here for a while. I cannot go back to that house with her in it, and I don't wanna alarm the kids just yet without the proper words."

"How about you just stay with me until you get settled? I could use the company. What do you think?" Olivia offered.

Elliot shook his head 'no'. In light of everything that happened earlier that day in the session, he said, "I don't think that's a good idea."

Olivia ignored what he said and responded, "Great! I will grab your things while you put your coat on."

Before Elliot could say a definite 'no', Olivia quickly grabbed his stuff and went down the stairs to her car. Elliot just followed.

They reached Olivia's apartment and Elliot followed her inside. He placed his belongings in his normal resting spot, the guest room. He went back out into the kitchen and living room area, Olivia was in the kitchen getting a beer.

Olivia called out to Elliot, "You want one?"

"Sure. Hey Liv?" Elliot said.

"Yeah?"

Elliot walked a little closer, took the beer and said, "Thank you… for everything."

Olivia said, "Please Elliot you don't have to say thanks. I need the company any way, I am tired of coming home and no one is here."

"I used to know the feeling." Elliot responded.

Both looked at each other for a minute and their heart began to race at the same time. Olivia was watching Elliot as if he was undressing himself before her eyes. Olivia noticed Elliot's chest rising up and down at her same pace, she decided that it would be best if she made an exit quickly. Elliot beat her to it.

"I am…uh going to take a shower." Elliot placed his beer down on the table and walked to the bathroom.

Olivia started to walk to her room but she passes the shower and began to think about what was said during the therapy session. 'Now is not the time to address that' she thought. She went to her room and proceeded to get ready for bed.

It was 3:30 in the morning and Elliot got out of bed because he could not sleep. He decided to go to the kitchen for a sip of water. Elliot left his room in nothing but his boxer-briefs.

Olivia woke up as well, because she heard a noise in the hall, she knew it was Elliot so she got up to see if he was alright. She exited her room with a matching sports bra and boy shorts.

Olivia was standing in the doorway of a dark kitchen to see Elliot drinking a glass of water in the moonlight. She was in shock of how good his body could look for his age. Olivia said, "Couldn't sleep huh?"

Elliot was startled by her because he expected her to be sleep. He in turn wasted the water on his chest. Olivia caught this mishap and said, "Wow… do you have a whole in your mouth or something?"

Elliot was in awe of what she was wearing he could not take his eyes off of her. Besides that time with Bushido, he has never seen Olivia half-naked. The water was dripping down his body and he said, "Is that what you wear to bed?"

Olivia looked at herself and said, "Yeah…some times its less than this cause I like to be comfortable."

Elliot's mind started running all over the place of what she would or wouldn't have on in the bedroom. He placed the cup in the sink and walked over to where Olivia was, and leaned up against the other side of the doorway. Olivia's doorway was very slender, so their bodies were almost touching each other. Olivia was looking at his body with the water dripping off his chest.

Olivia's eyes went down to his package and she noticed that he was handling some MAJOR equipment. Elliot's eyes were following what she was looking at, and he said, "What's on your mind Liv?"

She looked back up at him and said, "Nothing, are you alright?"

While she was talking Elliot began to look at her well toned stomach and got lost. His mind caught back up with him and he answered Olivia in a deep soft sexy voice, "I was gonna ask you the same question."

They looked at each other and shook their heads in laughter while watching the floor. Olivia turned her head upward and said, "El, I was just coming out here to make sure you were okay."

"Yeah Liv, I am fine. Thank you though." Elliot responded.

Olivia embraced Elliot with a hug, and said, "Welcome!"

This was not a quick ordinary hug. This felt like the longest hug ever. As Olivia had her hands on his back, she could feel the wetness begin to form between her legs. Elliot had his eyes closed because he was trying to focus on not becoming aroused, it happened anyway. They enjoyed feeling each others body, the close proximity brought out a clear understanding of what the other wants. Olivia could feel his arousal on her stomach, she wanted to take him to her bed so bad, but because of the situation with Eli, she chose not too.

Elliot's body was rushing all of his blood to one part of his body, so he made a rational decision real quick, "I think I need to go…back to bed." He released her body very slowly, he needed to get a lot situated before he could let Olivia feel what he has wanted for years.

"Uh…yeah me too." Olivia leaned back against the doorway while she saw Elliot walk back to his room. Olivia reached her bedroom and started thinking of Elliot in ways she has never done before. Olivia did not know that his touch could send electricity through her insides. Her fingers started to make a path to wear she could find orgasmic relief.

Elliot was trying to do push ups in his room to keep from entering hers. He laid down on the bed and started to reminisce about the past years of their partnership. As he was thinking about Olivia, he began to stroke his member until he was satisfied. He came to realize a lot about himself. He will never be satisfied, until he has her…forever.

Elliot's mind opened up a whole new revelation to him, he choose to reveal it in tomorrows meeting. As he drifted to sleep he said, "I can't keep it from myself…I can't keep it to myself anymore…She has to know everything!"

**LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!**


	5. The Third Meeting

**I really appreciate the reviews and I enjoyed reading them all especially the long ones. I am so sorry it took me so long to update. THANK SO MUCH FOR YOUR INTEREST IN THE STORY. **

**Melodic2686-**I feel ya…even though Kathy is a nice person, I have to make her into a B#%^$...it makes me feel better. Hah haha ha

**Beeper26x **-I am sorry for the withdrawal symptoms, I hope this helps.

**Svusvu**- Depends on where this story leads…they will jump each other bones…maybe. LOL

**Fluteskickbrass- **I apologize for the cliffhanger but, I wanted you guys to continue reading.

**I hope this SATISFIES you all! **

**Chapter 5: The Third Meeting**

Elliot woke up with a realizing what this day would mean for his partnership with Olivia. What he has to profess would either break them or bring them closer. He did not want to get to ahead of himself but he started to think that Olivia wanted him too. Elliot thought to himself, _"That look that she gave me last night was wild."_ Before going to sleep he understood that in order for him to be satisfied, he would have to state his feelings for Olivia. All of his feelings. He proceeded to get ready and head to work, but before he left he woke Olivia. Elliot was at Olivia bedroom door, his heart fluttered as he began to knock. He stopped knocking and slowly turned the knob.

Elliot quietly said, "Olivia… Liv…Livia. Wake up"

Elliot sat by her bed side, and gently rubbed her shoulder to wake her up. Olivia was starting to wake up and began to moan something, "Mmm right there El…right there."

Elliot had and instant hard on, because Olivia was dreaming about him. Today's session was going to be beautiful he thought. He pulled his jacket over himself and continued to wake her up.

Elliot said a little louder, "Hey partner. Get up."

Olivia got herself together and grasped the idea that Elliot was in her room fully dressed. Usually when he is in her room he is fully naked. Therefore she new this was not a dream.

Olivia stirred in the bed and groggily said, "Hey…dude what time is it?"

Elliot moved the hair out of her face and said, "Don't worry we do not have to be in until 9:30 and its 7:45. I have to get some more of my clothes from the house, and I don't wanna do it while Kathy is there. Maureen told me that she was coming to visit her this morning so…ya know"

Olivia looked at him, "Yeah I understand. You are more than welcome to stay here as long as you like."

He began to leave and said, "Yeah right! You will throw me out in less than a week."

"Elliot, please. No I will not." Olivia said laughing.

Elliot walked out of her bedroom and said, "See you later."

"Bye El!"

EOEOEOEOEOEOEO

The day at the precinct started as any other. Olivia and Elliot arrived on time, Munch and Fin came through the door ready to brief Cragen on a case they picked up in the middle of the night. Since it was sort of slow, Olivia and Elliot helped Fin and Munch follow and search leads for their case.

As time grew closer and closer to the therapy session, Elliot felt like his stomach was going to crash on him. Elliot thought that he was coming down with something, but he realized that it was because he was going to spill his guts to her.

It was almost time for them to walk to their therapy session, as they were getting ready to exit the precinct Olivia's cell phone rung. Olivia said, "Benson"

"Hey Olivia. This is Dean"

Olivia was stuck for a second. While she was on the phone, Elliot looked at her ready for her to tell him was on the phone. She never gave him the satisfaction of knowing… then. Olivia said shyly, "Hi Dean, how are you?"

He responded, "I'm fine, and yourself?"

"I am good, real good. How can I help you?" Olivia said trying to stay professional.

Dean said, "Actually with a lot. I have a problem, the FBI is throwing a little office ball and I have no one to escort me. I was wondering if you were free tonight?"

Olivia walked back to her desk to act like she was looking for something, her jaw dropped with surprise, "Wow Dean this is a bit of short notice, don't ya think?"

"Yeah I know but, I just decided that _I_ was even going. Look, anything you need I will buy for you, just please go to this party with me." Dean begged.

Truth be told, Olivia liked Dean Porter. She was really attracted to him when they were undercover, but she knows that he could not replace Elliot. Dean said in a low voice, "Olivia please?"

Olivia responded, "Yeah. I will go"

Dean said, "Great! I will come and pick you up at 7:00 tonight. The attire is formal. Oh Olivia, thank you so much. You will have a good time."

Olivia started to smile, "You better hope I do. See ya later"

"Bye Olivia"

Elliot was going crazy trying to figure out who was on the phone with her. He was watching her through the SVU precinct doors. Olivia was walking back toward Elliot, and he said, "Everything okay?"

Olivia was adjusting her badge and said, "Yeah El. Ready to go?"

Elliot mind got the best of him, "Yeah I'm ready. So who was that?"

Olivia replied, "Dean"

Elliot tried to look like he didn't care, "So what did he want?"

Olivia turned around as they started to walk, and said, "What's with the questions, El?"

"Sorry I just… I am sorry for prying" Elliot stated.

EOEOEOEOEOE

They reached Dr. Davis office and began to sit down for there session. Elliot's stomach was going crazy because he was about to risk it all on the line and tell Olivia how he feels. Olivia was scared also because she knew that the subject that they ended on will be brought up today. _Does Elliot love her_. Both started to fidget in their chairs as the doctor came in from the other room.

Dr. Davis entered the room and said, "Good Afternoon you two. How are we?"

"Good" Olivia said as she took her coat off.

Elliot nodded in agreement with Olivia.

Dr. Davis knew today was going to be a tough session for the duo because of what was said in yesterdays sitting. Dr. Davis decided to ease into it, "Okay people… yesterday we left with a posing question that needed to be answered. Let me remind you, what's said here will stay here. Now I will ask you again Elliot, do you love Olivia?"

Olivia felt her heart jump crazy in her chest. She wanted to know the answer because she loves him in everyway a woman could love a man. She sat back and was ready to let the information hit her like a train.

Elliot was barely holding himself together, but he knew that in order of having hopes to reach another level with her, he has to do this now. Elliot looked to Olivia and said, "Liv, can we turn our chairs facing each other?"

"Uh… Yeah." Olivia moved her chair as Elliot instructed.

Elliot moved his chair closer to Olivia to break the space between them. This action made Olivia's heart skip a couple of beats. Elliot did not speak until he had Olivia's full attention. His eyes were deep into hers, blue with brown.

Elliot began to smile and said, "I never thought that in a million years I would meet someone as wonderful and beautiful as you. I have to admit, when Cragen said that I was getting a female partner, I was thinking it was going to be a butch-female cop with something to prove. When I met you, I found out that it was just the opposite. I have a gorgeous, strong, independent partner that knows and cares about the job. As the years went and we grew close, I learned about you and vice versa. I found out that you were amazing. I started to tell you things that I wouldn't even tell my wife, and that's because I knew you would understand and not judge me for anything at all…"

Olivia was stunned as she kept listening.

Elliot continued as he looked into her eyes, "…When that case with Gitano happened, and I was faced with that decision, I hate to say it but my choice was easy because I can't live without you. If you were in trouble or hurt, Olivia I would run to you first no matter what. After you left, we grew apart for a while and I realized it more and more of how much I needed you in my life. I was empty without you. When you came back, I was so happy. When you were dating for a while I couldn't take it because I would get so jealous…"

Olivia's mouth dropped.

Elliot had a couple of tears stream from his face and said, "I get jealous. You go out with other guys and I get jealous. Even though I had a wife, when I see you with other guys I…get …jealous. Cassidy, Porter, Kurt and even when my mentor told me you guys were going to dinner I was jealous."

Olivia was deep in his eyes and said, "When I am with other guys I feel like I am betraying you or something."

Elliot's eyes was red as he said, "I felt the same way every time I went home to Kathy. After you broke up with Kurt Moss, I started to think that one of these days you are going to meet a guy that you _think_ is right for you… That hurt me so much because I know I am the ONLY ONE FOR YOU… but if I don't say anything or tell you, how will you know. You wonder why I stare in your eyes sometimes…it's because I am lost in them. Olivia, I see paradise in your eyes and that's where I want to be. I can't keep this to myself anymore, and I can't keep it from you. I am saying all this to say that I love you Olivia Benson and I have for a long time now, you mean so much to me that I will sacrifice my world to live in yours. I…I love you."

Olivia's heart stopped. All she could do was look at him and smile with happiness. She was speechless. "Elliot I love you so much, and I have loved you for so long that I cannot remember when I didn't."

Elliot and Olivia was staring at each other with such desire in their eyes, that they completely forgot that the doctor was in the room. Elliot eased up out of his chair and knelt to the floor right in front of Olivia and embraced her in the most beautiful hug. He held back from kissing her and whispered in her ear saying, "I really do love you Liv…really."

Dr. Davis could see the genuine and heartfelt feelings they had for one another. He said, "I'm glad that you too have finally come to understand how each other feels. I believe that not telling each other that you love the other for so long was the basis of your problems. You would not believe how many problems can arise from that because if the other does not know how you feel, how would they know if they are hurting you? It brings up other minor problems too..."

Elliot sat back into his chair never taking his eyes off of Olivia. Even though the doctor was happy for them he had to interject with a little reality. Dr Davis walked over there to them and said, "…If you guys are planning to explore this relationship then you cannot be partners anymore. Are you planning to risk that?"

Elliot looked to the floor because he knew that this question would come up. He shook his head and said, "Honestly, I do not want to give that up because I know that no one can watch your back like I can. I just want you to be my partner in so many ways. I need to watch your back."

Elliot watched as Olivia slowly began to cry tears of joy and sadness. Elliot said, "Olivia what's wrong?"

Olivia responded looking deep in his eyes, "I am so happy right now. I have been wishing for you to tell me that for so long that I have had dreams about this moment. As happy as I am, Elliot I cannot be the other woman in your life. If you are planning to get back with Kathy… or… I just can't be the other woman. I am not ready to give up our partnership either cause what if we don't work out? I will be so crushed. We'll have to talk later."

Elliot was very understanding, "Alright."

Dr. Davis continued on with the rest of the session talking about the paths they could take if they decided to be an item. The doctor touched on some subjects to of how Elliot can handle his wife. When the session was over, Olivia and Elliot walked out if the building feeling a new connection between them. They walked back to the precinct in silence but had occasional glances with over-romantic smiles.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEO

When they got back to the department, they immediately started helping Fin and Munch with their rape case. Unfortunately, there was no more time to enhance the connection that they had just built.

It was going on 4:50 in the afternoon, and Olivia was gathering her stuff to go. She looked over at Elliot and said, "Hey I am gonna head out. Okay?"

Elliot looked up and said, "Yeah cool, hey I was gonna help Fin and Munch for a second and then jet out of here. I was going to bring take-out on my way over there."

Olivia whispered in his ear, "That's fine I will be waiting"

Elliot's hair stood up on the back of his neck as she spoke. He didn't want to get his signals crossed, but he felt that he _needed_ to rush home to her. He helped Munch and Fin as quickly as he could and then headed to Olivia's apartment.

Olivia just got out of the shower and put on some clothes to lounge around in. She straightened up the place a little because she knew Elliot was coming over with food. As she was cleaning she heard a knock at the door, she yelled out as she was walking to open it, "Geez, Why didn't you just use your key?"

When she finally opened the door, she saw that it was Dean Porter dress to impress with a nice black-and-white tux. He said, "I would use a key if you give me one."

Olivia looked at the clock on the wall and it read, '6:57p.m.' She started to remember her conversation with Dean prior to the session. She looked back at Dean and said, "Hiiii, you are very early. I thought you said seven?"

Dean looked at her with a curious look and said, "You look as if you are surprised to see me here. Are you still going?"

Olivia said, "Yeah, sure. I was just getting ready"

As Olivia got ready Dean waited in the Living Room. Olivia was ready on record time, she had on a beautiful gown that she wore to Cragen birthday party one year. As her and Dean walked out of her apartment, he said, "Olivia you look gorgeous as always!"

"Thank you Dean. So do you. A lot different from Oregon huh?" Olivia stated.

Dean looked at her up and down and said, "You have no idea."

They walked down the hallway toward the elevator, as they were waiting, Dean said, "Thank you Olivia, I hope you have great time tonight."

The elevator dings and the doors began to open. Olivia looked at Dean and said, "I am sure we will."

Dean and Olivia was ready to walk into the elevator but a tall handsome figure holding food and a sarcastic smile said to the two, "I hope this is not another undercover gig!"

Olivia's heart stopped in her tracks again for the second time today. She rubbed her neck as she spoke with embarrassment, "Hi Elliot"

**CLIFFHANGER-Let me know what you think!**


	6. I am Sorry

**I AM SO SORRY!!! I have been on hiatus for months now… I am trying to move out of my place and it has been a long and crazy process. But I have been inspired…did you see the SVU episode, "Spooked", "Perverted" and " Shadow"? OMG! Everything about these episodes was GREAT! I just need them to get a BIT closer.**

**Disclaimer:**** I wish the show was mine, but its not! OH, if it was, 'Spooked' and 'Perverted' would have been crazy between Elliot and Olivia. In a GOOD WAY! Hah ahah ah**

**Chapter 6: I am Sorry**

"…_I started to think that one of these days you are going to meet a guy that you __think__ is right for you… That hurt me so much because I know I am the ONLY ONE FOR YOU… but if I don't say anything or tell you, how will you know. You wonder why I stare in your eyes sometimes, it's because I am lost in them. Olivia, I see paradise in your eyes and that's where I want to be…I love you Olivia Benson and I have for a long time now, you mean so much to me that I will sacrifice my world to live in yours. I…I love you."_

He confessed.

Elliot confessed.

Elliot confessed his love for Olivia earlier that day, and now he is holding bags of take-out in an open elevator as he stares at her and Dean Porter.

Elliot is mad as hell! He keeps eye contact with Olivia, being sarcastic he decides to break the silence first, "You two look like your dressed for the prom. So where are you headed?"

Dean responds with a huge grin, "We are headed to an FBI dinner."

Olivia looks very apologetic and can't help but shake her head slowly.

Elliot said, "Is that right! Well I hope you two have fun!"

Elliot steps out of the elevator, so Dean and Olivia can enter. Olivia starts feeling very nauseous because she looks as if she is caught in a bad place. She has never been place in this kind of predicament. Elliot slightly brushes Dean's shoulder as he passes. Dean asks another question knowing the answer. "That smells good Elliot who is the food for?"

Olivia looks to the floor, but Elliot looks dead at her. "Well I was coming by to discuss a new case over some food, but now I see the case is **closed**. I will put the food in your apartment Olivia. Goodnight."

With that Elliot turned around and continued to walk down the hall to her place and let himself in. He heard the elevator bell 'ding' as the doors shut. He quietly went into the apartment, placed the food down and went to the guest room to breathe.

Speechless.

Olivia was speechless.

Olivia's mind was running a million miles a minute. She was like a zombie walking to the car. Dean was trying to walk Olivia to her side of the car and be a gentleman by allowing her to enter first. He could feel the tension in her back and asked, "Let me guess, you have to go upstairs and be with Stabler?"

Olivia looked straight ahead, shook her head, and softly said, "I shouldn't be going anywhere with you, what am I doing?"

Dean turned her around to face him, "Look at me Olivia, look at me!"

Olivia finally looked at Dean.

Dean forcefully said, "What the fuck, Olivia! Is there something going on with you and your partner? Is that what you are telling me?"

Olivia smiled and said, "No, what I am telling you is that nothing will be going on between us."

"I don't understand this!" Dean just slightly backed away from her.

Olivia grabbed his hand and said, "Dean you are great guy and you will make some woman very happy, but by me being out here I am not doing anything but wasting your time and mine, because nothing will come of us besides a work relationship."

Dean knew in the back of his head that nothing would ever come of them, but he figured you might as well try. He calmly said, "I understand…its fine."

Olivia lightly smiled, "I am gonna have to go. I hope you have a good time tonight, but I have somewhere I need to be."

With that being said she ran upstairs to her apartment to try and talk to Elliot. When she hit the double doors of her building, Dean whispered, "Good Bye Olivia."

-----------------------------------------------E--------O----------------------------------------------

Olivia was at her apartment door. She placed her head against the door trying to search for the right words tell Elliot.

Olivia placed her key inside the lock to open the door. The place looked as if no one had entered at all. It was still somewhat dark inside with no signs of life anywhere. As she walked through the apartment, she saw the food on the living room table and noticed it was from her favorite Italian restaurant. This was same place where she and Elliot went during the first years of their partnership.

Olivia reached the guest room where he was staying and noticed that he had the lights off. She was ready to explain herself, so she knocked.

"El…can I come in please?"

Silence.

Elliot was sitting up on the edge of the bed looking out of the window in a white cut-off undershirt and some basketball shorts. He was in a state of confusion; he thought they were trying to build _something_ or try to get _closer_ in some way.

Elliot does not know what to think anymore. He made a decision that he will not make a move on Olivia unless she makes the first step. Elliot's feelings were hurt by just seeing her arm-in-arm with Porter. He started to think, _"After all the pint-up emotions and feelings I shared with her today, she has the nerve to go on a date with Porter?"_

Olivia tried again, "El…please can I come in?"

Elliot was lost, but finally responded with no emotion, "This is your place, you can do whatever you would like."

Olivia entered the room and found him looking out the window into the New York City sky. She wanted to walk over there and sit by him on the bed, but she opted not to because she thought that he might be upset at her. Olivia stayed right by the door.

There was an awkward silence for a while, so Olivia decided to break that quietness. She went for the big elephant in the room between them. "El…Porter called while I was at work…before the session, and asked me if I wanted to go to the dinner with him..."

Elliot remained faced toward the window. Frozen.

Olivia continued, "…I really and truly-"

Elliot interrupted her and said, "Olivia it does not matter, you don't need to explain anything to me at all."

Olivia closed her eyes for a brief moment and she could immediately see that he was not upset, he was hurt.

She went to speak again, "But I really forgot-"

"Liv, I don't wanna know." He interrupted again.

Olivia instantly got mad. Elliot was not going to let her talk or get a word in to explain herself or the situation.

"Why won't you let me talk?" Olivia yelled.

Elliot's head dropped as he felt her words crawl down his spine with chills.

"Talk then."

Olivia started, "I was going to say that I really forgot about the damn date! After the session, you were the only thing on my mind. Fuck Elliot, I answered the door as if it was you when he knocked."

"Why didn't you turn him around when he showed up?"

Olivia honestly did not have an answer, "I…I don't know."

Elliot closed his eyes and said, "If I had not been in the elevator as you were leaving, you would still be on the date with him."

Silence again.

Olivia knows it's true because it was the sight of Elliot's face that made her leave Porter.

"I am sorry Elliot"

Elliot's hands washed over his face as he comes to realize his own words. "_You would still be on that date." _ He slowly began to shake his head, but then he said, "Let's leave it alone. Please?"

Olivia did not say anything.

Elliot did not move from his spot facing the window, but all of a sudden he felt this swift charge of electricity creep all over his body.

His eyes opened immediately.

Both of her legs were placed on each side of Elliot.

Olivia was behind him and he was between Olivia's legs.

Before he could process what was happening, he felt Olivia's hands snake around his chest, pulling the back of his chest to her with her lips at his left ear.

"I can't leave it alone Elliot…I can't leave you alone." She whispered.

Her breath so close to his skin, alone, made Elliot want her.

Olivia's breast was on Elliot's back.

Every piece of blood that Elliot had in his body rushed to one specific place, he felt as if he was about to lose consciousness.

Elliot was enjoying the feeling of Olivia all over him; every spot on his body became solid, rigid and firm.

Olivia placed open-mouth kisses along his neck as she teased him with her tongue on his ear lobe.

She softly said, "Please baby, I am so sorry…Please"

Elliot breaths were beginning to be shallow and short, his hands started to message her thighs as she kept kissing all over him.

Elliot heard Olivia moan in his hear, still apologizing to him. As she kept up her movements, she could feel Elliot shaking, trying to control himself.

Olivia allowed her tongue to leave a trail of wetness from the bottom of his neck to the top of his ear. As she was kissing the other side of his neck, she rubbed on down pass his thighs and gently raked her nails towards his stomach.

Elliot moaned as his blue eyes closed.

Olivia went further as both of her hands went to touch his aroused dick.

Both of her hands were on his member as she was licking the middle of his back.

Elliot's mouth immediately dropped, as she began to stroke his dick.

"Ahh" Elliot couldn't even speak.

His eyes grew dark and all he could think of was pleasuring Olivia. Elliot could feel the pressure about to burst all over his body. Elliot jaw clenched, and he thought to himself, _"IT'S ON!"_

He finally turned towards her.

**-WANT MORE?-**


	7. The Makings Of You

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews, they have been inspiring and fun to read. I appreciate them all! ANY IDEAS to help with the story are more than welcomed! This may be a bit long…I couldn't stop…sorry**

**Disclaimer: NOT MINE. However Chris Meloni and I mess around every night, and I do mean EVERYNIGHT!!! By the way, he told me to tell you guys "HI!"**

**Chapter 7: The Makings of YOU**

When Elliot turned around, his eyes were darker than black cement in wet rain. Olivia was kind of scared yet turned-on because she has never seen this side from him.

As they were face-to-face, Elliot slowly and carefully studied her body from head to toe. When his eyes reached back to her face, he placed the palm of his hand on the left side of her cheek. He _wanted_ to reassure her that things were going to be fine. It looked as if he was going to say something, but didn't.

Elliot was on top of Olivia, while she was on her back with her elbows posting her up. Although she still had her dress on, Olivia could feel his strong body pressing between her legs. Since Olivia had never seen this emotion from Elliot, she was somewhat scared because she had no clue of what would happen next. He kept bringing his body closer to her, however she kept scooting backwards until she did not have anywhere else to go.

When she felt the headboard, she knew that there was no where else to turn. Olivia closed her eyes to prepare for any and everything that was about to happen between them. Elliot brushed his thumb over her cheek and said in a low sultry voice, "Open your eyes, Liv."

She obeyed.

Elliot remained still motionless, like a statue and said, "I want you so bad Liv…but you do understand that we need to really talk?"

"Yeah, we can talk later…" Olivia caressed his manhood and continued, "…but this need to happened now. I want to fuck you so bad!"

Elliot closed his eyes and turned his head to the side because he was ready to thrust her wet core so she can feel what was about to get _into_ her. He silently moaned her name and said, "Olivia I am serious."

Elliot was hovered over Olivia staring in her eyes. Her hands were roaming all over his chest as he was trying to speak. Olivia recognized his attempts to talk, so instead she said, "Tell me what's wrong?"

Elliot rested himself on top of Olivia and asked her, "Am I crushing you?"

"No, just tell me what's on your mind."

Elliot spoke from his heart and said, "If we do this, there is no coming back from it. I don't want a casual thing here, I want everything Olivia."

Silence.

Elliot moved a piece of hair out of her face and said, "I cannot continue hiding what I feel for you, it hurt enough when I kept it from myself. When I tried to make my feelings go away, they grew stronger. I am willing to risk everything I have to be with you, because I know we will work. Are you willing to give up everything to be with me?"

Olivia was stunned. She new these questions were going to come up at some point, but not as fast as right now. They just admitted that they were in love with each other earlier that day, she feels like they are moving to fast.

Olivia took a deep breath and said, "Does that include not being partners anymore?"

Elliot slowly shook his head saying 'yes'. "I was thinking about that as I was getting the food. I am willing to give up our partnership in order to hold you every night forever. I can't go back to not having you…then having you for a moment…then not having you again. I need to know, that before we go any further or do anything, that you want to really be with me."

Olivia opposed, "But Elliot I fell in love with you that way, as my partner. I think that if we lose that element of not being partners, then _we_ won't work. I don't trust anyone else watching my back but you."

"Hell, Olivia I don't either. But I can also say that I **don't** want another man touching you. I **don't** want another man kissing you. I **don't** want another man in your bed. I **don't **want another man making love to you. I **can't** be just your friend anymore. I need all of you. I am not saying, 'Hey lets go run and tell Cragen about us', but I want you to know the consequences if we do happen to get caught! Are you ready to risk that to be with me?"

Elliot could tell in her eyes that she was worried. He _wanted_ to reassure her that everything will be all right.

He really wanted too.

Elliot knew that the whole relationship situation with them will be rough. They will have to fight not to show public affection, they will have to act as if they are not as close as they are, he will have to restrain himself when someone shows interest in her, he will have to act nonchalant when Olivia goes undercover. There are so many factors, but he wants all of her…still.

They were nose-to-nose, Elliot watched her lips as he whispered, "Please answer me?"

Olivia is stunned by everything. Her mouth is partially opened, ready to speak. She was expecting to have sex just a minute ago and now she is defining her relationship with her colleague.

Everything is happening so fast!

Finally Olivia said, "I love you so much honey. I really do. I… I don't …know if I am ready to give that up! I would give anything for you Elliot. I am not ready to risk so much so soon. My soul might break if you are not watching my six, or me watching yours."

Elliot had to make himself breath.

Elliot swears that his stomach has dropped through the roof to Olivia's downstairs neighbors. He was hoping for a different answer, the answer he did NOT get. He placed his hand back on the side of her cheek and kissed her gently on the forehead. "I love you Olivia…I really do."

He moves to get up and yet he feels a tug on his back pulling him back down. Olivia angrily held him close and said, "So is that it? That's it. I thought… we were …going…to..."

Elliot finished her sentence. "What? Have sex?"

Olivia look confused, because she did not know what was going to happen or what the end of her sentence would be, but would she be crazy to say that she was kind of expecting that? Sex.

Elliot got up.

He left her in the guest room and went to take a shower.

Olivia got up and walked to her room thinking about the conversation that just transpired. She felt like she has just ruined some thing that could be so special to both of them. Olivia has never considered Elliot not being her partner, honestly she is very frightened by the thought.

Olivia heard the shower shut off, and then she heard the guest room door close.

For the rest of the night the apartment was in silence, with both individuals wide awake.

---------------------------------------------EO--------------------------------------------

Right when Elliot finally went to sleep, his cell phone rung. He reached out for the device, without lifting his eyelids, hoping that he would not knock anything over.

"Stabler"

"Elliot, we have a body on 67th and Dobbins, it looks like it could be a rape case." Captain Cragen said.

"Cap, I thought Munch and Fin were catching tonight?"

"Well Elliot if they were catching tonight then I would not be calling you, now would I?" Cragen felt a little irritated with all his detectives these days and was thinking about taking a much needed vacation.

Elliot washed his hands over his face and said, "No Sir, I am sorry."

Just before Cragen hung up, he said, "Just reach your partner and get down here."

Elliot hung up the phone and looked at the time on the clock.

4:15 a.m.

Elliot sprouted right up and put on his clothes to go to the crime scene. He knows that he has to wake Olivia and tell her the news also. Elliot came out of the room and walked towards Olivia's bedroom.

He knocked once.

"Yeah" Olivia said.

"_She was awake",_ he thought to himself. Elliot stayed behind the door during the chat.

"Sorry to wake you Liv-"

Olivia immediately cut him off, "I wasn't sleep. I can't sleep"

Elliot continued, "Yeah…we have a body on 67th and Dobbins. I'm gonna go ahead and head there."

"Okay." With that she got up, put her clothes on and headed out of the door, minutes after Elliot.

They both arrived at the crime scene in separate cars to not raise any suspicion of their temporary living arrangement. They have always had an up-spoken rule: "Keep work as work." Anything that happened else where should not interfere with the job they had to complete. Olivia arrived and saw Elliot was already well at work. She walked over, already prepared for the dreadful day to begin.

Elliot looked over his shoulder to see Olivia at his right side. She smiled for an instant, almost as if she never did at all. "So…what do we got?"

Elliot let out a big exhausted sigh, "Carrie Smith, 27, she was found by a guy that was emptying his trash. She has blunt force trauma to the head with bruising and blood coming from her genitals."

Olivia bent down with her gloves and slightly pulled up the sheet that was covering her from the crowd. "It looks as if she was sodomized with something also." Olivia was glancing over her body and found something, "I think we have DNA"

Elliot looked shocked, "The perp left a calling card?"

"Seems so…It's all over her inner thigh."

"This has to be a first offender, no actual rapist would be dumb enough to leave that behind unless he wanted to get caught."

An NYPD officer came to the duo and asked, "The coroners is ready to document the scene and get the body, is it ok if the start now?"

Elliot looked at Olivia for approval, and she nodded her head twice and then Elliot said, "That's fine, let us know what else you find."

"Yes sir." The officer started to walk away but then came back and said, "Oh, we found a phone under the dumpster. We assume it's hers. It's already bagged and tagged."

Elliot and Olivia went over to the car where the phone was held. By searching through the phone they found out that Carrie Smith placed an event notice for a date with a Chuck Jones.

Elliot looked at her and proceeded to walk to his car, "This has to be the last guy to see her alive. How about we head to the squad, get an address, and go wake him up. "

"Sure" As Olivia saw Elliot walk to his car, she stopped him and softly said, "Hey, about…you know…last night. I am sorry, I do love you El, but… I'm just scared. I am not ready to give us up as partners. I'm sorry."

"I was not saying it would happen immediately Olivia, but if we _were _to get caught or something, Cragen will separate us."

"I know. I don't wanna risk that." Olivia looked at him with such pain. "I am sorry."

"Yeah. Me too."

He walked off.

------------------------------------------------EO-----------------------------------------

When they reached the station house they did not speak about anything else but the case. They reached Chuck Jones's address, and when they knocked on the door, the pair could see the guilty look all over his face. The case was opened and then closed before the noon could break.

Chuck Jones confessed.

It was 1:03 in the afternoon and Elliot and Olivia were sitting at their desk writing their DD-5's on the Carrie Smith case. Munch and Fin came in discussing a decade old case where an innocent husband took the murder wrap for his wife.

"All I'm saying… is that I don't care how much I love my wife, I am not going to jail for her. Love is not that deep." Munch sat down at his desk rubbing his knees.

Fin shook his head, "You would say that. That's why you have been divorced forty-five times! You have no love for nobody."

Munch walked up to get some coffee, "True! But if the police came knocking at my door asking about a dead body, and I knew she did it? I am pointing the police directly to her."

"Man, you are crazy." Fin leaned back in his chair and asked a random question, "Now tell me this, would you go on the run with your wife if you knew she could go to prison for life?"

As Munch sat back down, and looked at Fin over his glasses, "Why are you asking me, I have love for nobody. Remember? My answer is easy. NO!"

"Man whateva." Fin turned to Olivia. "Hey Liv, what about you?"

Olivia did not even lift her head, "Sorry what's the question?"

"Would you run away with your husband if you knew there was a chance he could go to prison for life?"

Olivia smiled, "I don't know. If I love him, I may run away with him."

Fin chuckled a little bit and said, "So you would risk being a fugitive for the rest of your life, for your husband?"

Olivia laughed while she turned the page on her DD-5, to start the next section, "Dangerous huh?"

Elliot was acting as if he was not listening to their conversation, but as she talked he began to get furious. He thought, _"Oh, she'll risk being fugitive, than a chance at a relationship with me!"_ Elliot's body got hot with anger and pain. Before he knew it the words shot from his mouth like a canon.

"You're one to talk about risk!"

Silence.

Olivia immediately stopped writing and looked in Elliot's direction with infuriation, "What'd you say?"

The whole squad kept going on with the day-to-day activities, but Munch and Fin were the only ones paying attention with snooping eyes going back and forth from Elliot to Olivia.

Elliot snapped back quickly, but quietly, "You're full of it. You heard me!"

Olivia's madness went from zero to ten in five seconds. She realized that he was talking about the talk from last night and this morning. She bit back, but not as quiet as Elliot, "Fuck you!"

Elliot did not even break a smile and said, "You wish."

Silence Again.

Olivia walked out the squad room and went to the cribs to calm her nerves down before she shoots her own partner.

Munch turned to Fin, "See what you did?"

"Shut up man!" Fin walked to Elliot and said, "What's eatin' ya'll?"

Elliot stared straight ahead to where Olivia was sitting and said, "Nothing"

"Aight man, ya'll better chill out before Cap gets a wind of it, and separate ya'll for good!" Fin walked back to his seat.

Elliot sat there and though about it. If he and Olivia keep going on this route that they are on, Cragen will separate them for their arguments and disturbances in the department, rather than the relationship he was trying to attempt.

Elliot got up and walked to the cribs.

Elliot entered without announcing himself. He saw Olivia leaning on the lockers with her back facing the door.

He stood at the door, "Liv I-"

Olivia interrupted, "Do not speak to me Elliot, seriously!"

"Liv, listen! You would risk being a fugitive rather than a relationship with me. I am sorry that hurt but I shouldn't have said that."

Olivia did not move, "Don't speak to me"

"Fine, but remember this, you risk a lot… if you risk nothing at all!"

The comment struck her in the stomach like a knife, because she knew he was right. However, she still stood there.

Elliot had his hand on the knob to walk out the door but he instantly changed his mind. He quietly locked the door and wanted to tell her of a song he heard. "I know this is not the right time for this but I heard a song on the way to the crime scene this morning and it made me think of you."

Olivia put her hand up, "Don't"

Elliot proceeded to speak anyway:

_A little sugar  
honeysuckle and  
A great big expression of happiness  
Girl you couldn't miss.  
With a dozen roses  
Such would astound you  
The joy of children laughing around you  
These are the makings of you  
It is true, the makings of you_

It's been a miracle  
for what you've done  
Please stay by my side  
Two can be one.  
It's the righteous way to go  
Anyone would know  
Or believe if I told them so  
YOU'RE SECOND TO NONE

Love of all mankind  
should reflect some sign  
Of the words I'm trying to recite.  
They're close, but not quite  
It's almost impossible to do,  
Describing the makings of you.

As he spoke, Olivia calmed down with flattery. She turned around and he was standing directly behind her. Elliot ran his index finger across her cheek.

"Forgive me. Please"

Elliot eyed her lips as he inched closer and closer to her face. He stopped for a second so if Olivia wanted to pull away she could. He couldn't believe it when she did not pull away. She was still there.

Still.

They came together and kissed for the first time. Olivia instantly moaned into his mouth as she felt his tongue escape with a brief swipe to her lips. Her hands found his face and his chest as she continued to kiss him back.

When Olivia deepened the kiss, she put her hand on the back of his neck. As she did this, Elliot grunted while softly pushed her back into the lockers so she could feel what's happening to dick. Elliot couldn't control himself now, he started pawing at her body.

There is a knock at the door.

**MORE?**


	8. I Don't Know What to DO!

**SO SORRY FANFICTION. I have been gone for so long, due to things I cannot control. LOL. Anyway, I have other ideas and more stories to come so PLEEEAAASSSEEE be patient with me! I have to work everyday…LOL!**

**Don't forget to review…**

**Disclaimer: They are mine…no, they are mine. Just in my…MIND!**

Chapter 8: I Don't Know What to DO

There is a knock at the door.

As soon as they heard the knock, Elliot and Olivia were trying to act casual as if they were not just all over each other. She was still against the lockers and Elliot was still directly in front of her.

Just not as close.

Elliot had his back to the door and didn't even turn around when he heard the distraction. His eyes were glued to her. Olivia on the other hand, was facing the door, therefore she saw the intruder and she knows that he saw more than he should have.

Olivia wiped her lips and looked to the floor. "Hey Fin."

Fin was not that shocked at what he had seen. He knew that there had been sexual tension between them for years and it was bound to come out at some point. Fin stuck his head in before he knocked and caught and eye full.

Fin rubbed his cheek and said, "Hey…uh are you alright Liv?"

Olivia responded with a light smile, "Yeah. We were just talki…"

Elliot interrupted her, "Fin, can you give us a minute?" He didn't even turn around when he spoke.

Elliot's eyes were still on her while she watched Fin.

"Cool. Captain wants all of us downstairs for a briefing on the changes of protocol." Fin was about to leave but Olivia quickly expressed her gratitude for his silence. She knows Fin better than his other co-workers do; one thing that he respects is privacy.

"Thank you."

Fin slightly smiled and winked at her as he shut the door behind him.

They were alone again.

Alone.

Elliot was about to apologize to Olivia but before he could even speak, she said, "What have we done? We have to remember we are at work…Elliot we cannot be this careless again."

Olivia walked past him and shut the door to the cribs as she left to attend the meeting. Elliot waited until a couple of minutes past and followed her actions as well.

-EO-

After the meeting, Olivia was sitting at her desk trying to complete the last DD-5 she was on before all the drama had started. Fin was watching her from his desk. Since she is an excellent detective, Olivia was very aware that he was looking at her, so she finally looked up and Fin mutely mouthed, "Wanna talk?"

Olivia nodded her head.

Fin wrote something down on a piece of paper, slipped her a note, and walked past her.

_Meet me on the roof in 5,_

_FIN_

Fin left out of the door heading to the roof. Olivia waited a couple of minutes and followed him.

Elliot's wandering eyes were lurking at his co-workers from upstairs.

Fin was already on the roof watching the city below when Olivia arrived. He turned to her and said, "I don't want to pry."

"Then don't!" Olivia quickly responded with a small smile.

Fin started to chuckle, "How long has it been going on?"

Olivia walked over to the edge, standing right by Fin watching the city below. She let a long breath, "Just today."

Fin eyes rose up in a state of shock, "Wow Liv, I thought you guys were going at it for… months."

Olivia turned to him, "Why would you think that? Elliot is truly devoted to his family."

"Devoted as he maybe, Elliot's eyes still travel towards you. He looks at you in a totally different way than we do. Every one can tell, sometimes I would catch him watching as you walk by, or when Cragen partners us up-then the unstable Stabler comes out. Am I wrong?"

Olivia just shook her head and said, "No. I just don't know what…to do about it."

"Do you have feelings for him?"

Olivia started to think about them on the bed last night and how Elliot felt above her. She began to smile, "Yeah I do."

Fin didn't understand, "Then, what's the problem?"

"He is technically married and we work together. If we get caught, Captain would split us up and or one of us would be transferred. Then if it doesn't work…" She looked away from Fin, "…it would break me. I don't want to risk losing him like that. By the way, I appreciate your silence."

"Always Liv. I'm no rat, you know that."

Olivia nudges Fin, "I know."

Fin smiled and said, "However I would win a major pile of money if I tell Munch. We have been betting on this since 2002."

Olivia laughed, "What! You've been betting on me and El?"

Fin countered, "He came up with the bet…not me!"

Olivia and Fin stayed up there for a while longer talking and admiring the busy sites of New York. Olivia reached for her cell phone, but realized it was on her desk. Olivia said, "The sun is setting. Maybe we should get back."

Fin looked at his watch, "Yeah it's almost time to go home."

They left for the bull pen together.

-EO-

Olivia and Fin walked through the doors of the precinct. They went to their respective seats and began to get ready to go home. Olivia was the last to log out of her computer, as she was about to leave she read a small taped note on the lower part of her monitor from Elliot.

_Allow me to make it up to you. Dinner and a movie?_

_Elliot_

Olivia couldn't help but smile when she thinks of how sweet Elliot is trying to be. Olivia always wanted more than a friendship with Elliot, but over the years she has learned to control her feelings and desires. She knows now that he is in love with her and she is in love with him. Now, that he has expressed his wishes and needs, her love for him is now stronger than ever.

Olivia smiles.

As she grabs her coat and files, she heads for the door. Olivia pulls out her cell- phone and dials Elliot.

He answers, "I am sorry about today"

She responds, "Where are you?"

"By my car, waiting for you."

Olivia still smiles as she walks, "Oh really."

Elliot began to chuckle. "Yes. Did you get my note?"

She has exited the building, "Yes. I did."

Elliot is looking toward the street, "So…what's your answer?"

Olivia walked towards Elliot's car and stood behind him saying, "Sure. Why not?"

Elliot turned around looked at his beautiful partner. He wanted to hug and kiss her right in front of the precinct doors, but he knew it would start more unnecessary problems.

Elliot showed restraint.

He helped her into his car, and then got in himself. He decided not to start the car until he fully apologized to her. "Liv, I am seriously sorry about today. I promise not to act out like that again, no matter what I am feeling. Do you forgive me?"

Olivia nodded, "Yeah, El of course I do. We just need to keep our private life separate from work."

Elliot agreed.

-EO-

They went out to dinner and to a movie, and all through the while he acted as if he wasn't he co-worker, but instead her boyfriend. Elliot portrayed a pure gentleman, however, he would try to hold her hand and kiss her on the cheek. Olivia was not too happy about the public display of affection, especially when they have not explained to each other what this relationship is. When they walked through the doors of Olivia's apartment, Elliot could tell that something was on her mind.

Elliot closed the door and took his jacket off, "You okay Liv."

Olivia walked to the kitchen and poured a drink for herself, "We can't do that in public El. There is no telling who saw us tonight."

Elliot stalks into the kitchen after her, "Okay FINE! Now we are in private!"

Olivia is faced toward the faucet drinking her water. Elliot is behind her in an instant, he holds the counter on the both sides with her in between. Olivia can feel his sweet breath on her neck and she knows that Elliot is present. Olivia closes her eyes as she tries to control the juices flowing between her thighs.

She is breathing.

She is breathing.

She is breathing.

Elliot has studied Olivia long enough to know that she is aroused and so is he. Elliot has been hard for her for hours, even when they argued in front of the precinct, he wanted her then. Elliot's dick is so hard that it's jamming her in her ass. He feels as if he can't control himself anymore, so he thrusts forward.

She stops breathing.

Elliot's head is on the back of her neck. He slowly pleads, "Make a move Olivia."

Olivia turns toward him, and her mind is clouded with so many questions._ 'How can we keep our relationship out of the department, what will his family think, what if we get caught, what if we don't work and you are still married?' _She tries to block those questions out.

She decides to take it one day at a time…starting right now.

Olivia kisses Elliot until he can't breathe and she explores every soft section in his mouth. Her tongue tangles with his and Elliot is trying to fight for control. He gently holds her face as they continue to let go. When Olivia feels her thighs get wetter, she pushes him away and softly speaks.

"I wanna taste you"

**Next one will be total SMUT and SEX. **

**REVIEW please? Good or bad, believe it or not…it helps!**


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